Ask An Iranian

You have lots of questions about Iran, we know! One of which—maybe the third—is likely to be, “Is it safe to visit Iran?”. If you ask us, we’d say yes. If you ask your Home Office, they’d say no. Sure, it’s complicated, and if you’re reading this any time between 1979 and 2029, it’s even more complicated. Disclaimer about whether it’s safe to visit Iran: We do not, and will never, advocate any travel that contravenes the travel advice provided by your nation’s Home Office. Information about travelling to Iran is constantly changing, so always consult with the relevant authorities before making any plans. Travelling to and inside Iran can be risky, possibly more riskier than visiting London. Don’t say you weren’t warned. Questions we also tackle in this episode: The Red Line podcastthe Island of QeshmStabberstanGeorge You can find Daisy on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/d_lorenzi/ And Michael’s podcast can be found here: https://twitter.com/TheRedLinePod And you can read more here! Music credit: “Mahvash, Parivash”, Jalal Hemmati | “Ask An Iranian Outro”, The Devildog Image credit: European tourist begging for help in a fictional traditional Iranian setting, made using images generated with MidJourney and edited specifically for Ask An Iranian, 2023. Read more and find the links on ASKANIRANIAN.COM Check the merchandise out on ASKANIRANIAN.COM/SHOP

We put it out to our Iranian audience. We asked them if they prefer their men cut, i.e. circumcised. They mostly preferred it. We also asked them if they think being cut is a good idea. They mostly thought it was a good idea. Lastly, we asked them if they would have their next male child cut. They were kinda 50/50 on this. Where did the enthusiasm for circumcision in Iran go?! The practice of circumcision goes way back — like 15,000 years back. Yes, apparently Egyptians are depicted as performing circumcision before Judaism and Islam adopted it into their rituals. Fast forward to the modern day and we now have health reasons to help perpetuate this practice. In fact, health was the main reason given to us by our audience for why they think it's a good idea. Another top listed reason was beatification. Some of the questions we get answers to in this episode Read more here! Music credit: “Mahvash, Parivash”, Jalal Hemmati | “Ask An Iranian Outro”, The Devildog Image credit: image of a circumcised banana representing a golden penis, or "doodool tala" as Iranians say. All of the Ask An Iranian podcast covers are available as NFTs here. Read more and find the links on ASKANIRANIAN.COM Check the merchandise out on ASKANIRANIAN.COM/SHOP

You might have uncles, and you might have aunties. Iranians, however, have uncles, and they have uncles, and they have non-uncle uncles. This is because the titles given, differ, depending on the relation. Although this is not unique to Iran, there are many uniquely Iranian things that the world needs to know about Iranian aunts and uncles. What are they? Like any good Iranian uncle, we attempt to get deep into things. In this episode, we discuss the Persian words for aunts and uncles. We also let you know why Iranians, seemingly, have different feelings towards their aunts and uncles, depending on if they are your mother or father's sibling. As if that wasn't enough, we get into the good, the bad and the ugly Persian terms that involve Iranian aunts and uncles. We believe that comedy can help highlight disturbing topics by helping bring about awareness, and subsequent change for the better. In this episode we tackle one of the more disturbing ones: that of child abuse. We’ve heard anecdotal evidence of such happenings, and elude to this during our conversation. We conclude the conversations about this with a warning to those that might fall prey to such horrors. It goes without saying that we find such crimes against children abhorrent. Questions we also get answers to in this episode Music credit: “Mahvash, Parivash”, Jalal Hemmati | “Ask An Iranian Outro”, The Devildog Image credit: Remastered image based on the promotional poster for the Iranian movie, "Amoo Sabzi Foroosh", edited by Ask An Iranian, 2022. This artwork has been used for the related podcast episode cover. All of the Ask An Iranian podcast covers are available as NFTs here. Read more and find the links on ASKANIRANIAN.COM Check the merchandise out on ASKANIRANIAN.COM/SHOP

[NOTE OF WARNING: please read below before setting up an account for NFTs.] How much is a really good replica of a Mona Lisa worth? It might only be worthy of wiping your rear with — which should come as no surprise to you. This is because she’s a one-off work of art, or “non-fungible”. The digital realm has brought many great things with its advent, but until recently, freely replicating information made digital ownership very fungible. This has changed with the introduction of Web 3.0. We were joined by the Iranian artist, Nightwatcher, who recently shifted from being a regular real-world artist to an NFT artist. The NF part stands for non-fungible, and the T is for token. This means, his art is minted using certain technologies and made available for people to own the rights to. Control-C and Control-P his stuff if you like, he doesn’t mind. You won’t own it in the true sense. This gentleman joined us to chat about the changing world of art with respect to NFTs, but also shared with us his experience of the Iranian art scene. He explains these changes are affording Iranian artists—especially—with a new means to be able to avoid restrictions. During our discussion, we also touched upon how emerging technologies, seen with Web 3.0 for example, are changing people's association with the internet and each other. Read more here to get au fait with all things NFTs in Iran. NOTE OF WARNING: in this episode, we advocate the NFT platform, OpenSea. This company restricts activity for people that are related to Iran. Do not use their services if this description relates to you. Similarly, be warned, other platforms may also have such restrictions. Always check a platform's restrictions before setting up an account. DISCLAIMER: Ask An Iranian and Nightwatcher are not investment advisers. All opinions are our own. There are risks involved in placing any investment in securities or in Bitcoin, cryptocurrencies and NFTs... or in anything for that matter. None of the information presented herein is intended to form the basis of any offer or recommendation or have any regard to the investment objectives, financial situation, or needs of any specific person, and that includes you, our dear listener or reader. Everything you’re going to hear or read is for informational entertainment purposes only. Questions we also get answers to in this episode Music credit: “Mahvash, Parivash”, Jalal Hemmati | “Ask An Iranian Outro”, The Devildog Image credit: NightwatcherXHomadokht + Ask An Iranian, Acid Ajam remix NFT artwork, 2022. Copyright... to whoever buys it here. Read more and find the links on ASKANIRANIAN.COM Check the merchandise out on ASKANIRANIAN.COM/SHOP

Jesus Christ! We love him! Muslims love him! He’s one of the prophets that we Muslims recognise. In fact, in the Quran, he gets mentioned by name 25 times, making him the most mentioned person in the holy book. You might also be surprised to hear that communities of Christians live among Muslims in Iran — yup! Jews too… but we’ll save that for another time. To help us learn what it’s like to be a Christian in a Muslim nation, we called on a Christian — not just any old Christian though. We called on a priestess, no less! Kirsten Wolandt is a pastor at the German Speaking Congregation in Tehran and regularly runs services to a mostly-German expat community in Iran. She agreed to join us for a chat about her experiences of being a Christian in a Muslim nation. During our discussion, we spoke about the many similarities and differences between Christianity and Islam. We also put the priestess’s carols singing skills to the test and sang a song for the occasion of Christmas. Questions we also get answer to in this episode Find more information about German Speaking Evangelical Congregation in Iran. Music credit: “Mahvash, Parivash”, Jalal Hemmati | “Ask An Iranian Outro”, The Devildog | "Carol of the Bells Remix", Approaching Nirvana Image credit: picture of a Christmas tree with the symbol for the Islamic Republic of Iran sitting up top, created by Ask An Iranian, 2021. Read more and find the links on ASKANIRANIAN.COM Check the merchandise out on ASKANIRANIAN.COM/SHOP

In Iran we don't refer to somebody as the special child of a family — we refer to them as the golden willy. And, we think that's cute, if not a little sexist. Fret not though dear sisters, because this is not considered a compliment. A golden willy, or "dodool talā" as we say in Persian, can also be described as a mummy's boy. For a gender-neutral term, we say "bache naneh" to imply that a person is spoilt. Now, are there multiple terms in Persian for this because Iranian men are mostly mummy's boys? Seemingly yes — but hear us out. Once again—and by popular demand—we invited Shanay to join us and share her perspective. Yes, we couldn't go into a matter concerning Iranian men, without an Iranian women's perspective. We're not necessarily suggesting that Shanay knows more about golden willies than we do... but we kinda are. Don't just listen to us though! No, no! Among other related questions, we put it out to our Iranian audience and asked them whether Iranian men are mommy's boys. The results were more frightening than we expected — yes, you were warned. So, wanna know if, how, and why Iranian men have a complex relationship with their mothers. Read more here. Questions we also get answers to in this episode Music credit: “Mahvash, Parivash”, Jalal Hemmati Image credit: 3D golden banana on a turquoise background, created by Ask An Iranian. Read more and find the links on ASKANIRANIAN.COM Check the merchandise out on ASKANIRANIAN.COM/SHOP

No, this isn't about tourist stuff — no, no, this one is about what you're kinda forced to do in Iran. And yes, you'd be forgiven for thinking that a list of what you must do in Iran would be longer than other nations — but is that strictly true? Well, probably yes. How much more, is something we go deep into, with this episode. As you might expect, there are dress codes that you must respect in Iran (for both men and women), and there are several musts that you won't expect. For example, you must officially name your child a certain way. With the help of our Iranian audience, we get into this, and more — so be sure to read more here to learn more. Questions we also get answers to in this episode 5th dimension version of yourself Music credit: “Mahvash, Parivash”, Jalal Hemmati Image credit: original photo of multiple Iranian women in black hejāb by Mehdi Sepehri on Unsplash, edited by adding a face mask to the child, by Ask an Iranian. Read more and find the links on ASKANIRANIAN.COM Check the merchandise out on ASKANIRANIAN.COM/SHOP

You might say you speak German, French, or Swahili, but you never say you speak Deutsch, Français, or Kiswahili. This is the logic behind people saying they speak Persian—when saying it in English—as opposed to saying they speak Farsi. Why let logic get in the way of your "feels" though?! You call it what you want! Farsi or Persian, Parsi or Iranian, who cares?! Oh, we do, kinda — enough at least that we'd make a podcast episode about it. To help us get into this much contested topic, we sought the help of a popular language enthusiast. We called upon Canada-based Iranian, Bahador Alast, to help us clear this one up... for now at least. Since 2013, Bahador has invited many international guests on his YouTube channel to talk with him about similarities between languages. Up until late 2021 these videos have been seen around 45m times. So is it Farsi, or is it Persian? Listen to this episode to hear our take — then come for us in the comments. Questions we also get answers to in this episode Follow Bahador Alast: https://www.instagram.com/BahadorAlast https://www.youtube.com/c/BahadorAlast Music credit: “Mahvash, Parivash”, Jalal Hemmati Image credit: Ali-Akbar Dehkhoda, Iranian linguist and author of the Dehkhoda dictionary - edited with the tongue of Albert Einstein - Ask An Iranian, some rights reserved – 2021 Read more and find the links on ASKANIRANIAN.COM Check the merchandise out on ASKANIRANIAN.COM/SHOP

The Americans have obesity, the French have snobbery and the Saudis have hacksaws, but what is the most Iranian thing? To help figure this one out, we called on the help of our audience, and the results... were weird, in parts. We obviously got answers such as Persian rugs, nose jobs, and saffron, but we weren't expecting so many things related to the toilet. So, to help you get familiar with why the most Iranian things are the most Iranian things, be sure to check our website here. Questions we also get answers to in this episode tomato ketchup to everything Music credit: “Mahvash, Parivash”, Jalal Hemmati Image credit: aftabeh with the ancient Persian Cyrus Cylinder from the 6th century BC (British Museum London) and the Golden Achaemenid Rhyton from 5th century B.C.E. (National Museum of Iran) - Artwork by Ask An Iranian, 2021. Read more and find the links on ASKANIRANIAN.COM Check the merchandise out on ASKANIRANIAN.COM/SHOP

You make sounds — mouth sounds. You make them with intention because you probably want to ask your Pilates instructor if you can swap Tuesdays for Mondays. Other peoples do this, but with different mouth sounds — mouth sounds that have gradually found characters, and gradually become alphabets. This is pretty handy because it'll help you kinda figure out the intentions of peoples with very different mouth sounds. Pingilish (or Fingilish) is the Romanisation of the Persian (or Farsi) language. It can help you figure out the response of your Iranian pilates instructor. So, assuming you have no grasp of the Persian alphabet but share an understanding of those mouth-sounds — "aakhey!" — Tuesdays get swapped for Mondays. In this episode, we discuss how Pingilish (or Fingilish) came into use, and why it's kinda going out of use. We also get into which Persian phonemes can have which Latin characters, because yes, there is no standard. So, wanna learn what Pingilish (or Fingilish) is and how to use it. Read more here: https://askaniranian.com/fingilish-or-is-it-pingilish Questions we also get answers to in this episode write in Pingilish or Fingilish from Persian script Music credit: “Mahvash, Parivash”, Jalal Hemmati Image credit: The Fingilish or Pingilish word for "which", written in many Romanised ways, and styled like an old Nokia mobile phone. Designed by Ask An Iranian, 2021. Read more and find the links on ASKANIRANIAN.COM Check the merchandise out on ASKANIRANIAN.COM/SHOP

To Iranians, ze Germans are foreign, but ze Chinese… well, they're just Chinese! It’s the same with many other nationalities and ethnicities for Iranians in Iran — some are foreign and some are just themselves. This type of categorisation tacitly exists and is just… discriminatory. Yes, it’s kinda racism, but the good kind, right! Iranians will hold certain peoples in high esteem and although they won’t make their prejudices institutional, they will bestow privilege to those deemed foreign. Enraged? Don’t be! Allow us to explain how it is that Iranians can be racist, kinda. Throughout this episode, we also provide anecdotes from various foreign friends of the show. They were kind enough to share their stories of how Iranians have judged them as foreigners. These stories were provided by a Brazilian, a Brit, a Syrian, and an Afghanistani. Most of their experiences were positive, but no prizes for guessing which of them experienced the opposite. So, go here if wanna read more about why Iranian love foreigners, but only certain foreigners? Questions we also get answers to in this episode Image credit: Marion Doss, via Flickr - "Conference of the 'Big Three' at Yalta makes final plans for the defeat of Germany. Prime Minister Winston Churchill, President Franklin D. Roosevelt, and Premier Josef Stalin." February 1945. Image edited by Ask An Iranian, 2021. Music credit: “Mahvash, Parivash”, Jalal Hemmati Read more and find the links on ASKANIRANIAN.COM Check the merchandise out on ASKANIRANIAN.COM/SHOP

You do it. We do it. Even educated Iranian PhDs do it. Let's do it. Let's show a little extra gratitude. So yes, Iranians do have a culture of tipping, but there are differences. Now, where, when and how should you show this gratitude when tipping in Iran — well, allow us to explain. In this episode we discuss how to tip in Iran by sharing our experience of such moments. We tell you how Iran is similar to other nation with respect to tipping, as well as how it differs. For example, you probably should tip your taxi driver that will pick you up at the airport, but you won't necessarily tip drivers for inner city journeys. If you're staying in Iran for a while, you may have a porter that will take care of odd-jobs here and there, but when should you tip and how much? Listen to this episode, to learn how Iranians go about tipping, and thank us later for the millions (of Rials!) you'll likely save. Questions we also get answers to in this episode restaurant Image credit: Tip jar with a QR code leading to the Ask An Iranian Support page. Music credit: “Mahvash, Parivash”, Jalal Hemmati Read more and find the links on ASKANIRANIAN.COM Check the merchandise out on ASKANIRANIAN.COM/SHOP

We want your questions, BUT... not those questions! No, we're not talking about the ones where we get asked about where men can meet men in Iran. No, no, it's that one question that we repeatedly get asked. It's asked by our parents, our siblings, our aunts and uncles, and most of our friends. In this episode, we answer that question. We would, however, prefer to answer your questions about Iranians and their culture. We would also prefer, try to get you the Iranian take on things. Regardless, you asked an Iranian, so we'll happily answer. Questions we also get answers to in this episode Music credit: “Mahvash, Parivash”, Jalal Hemmati Image credit: Two women (bottom: "the incomparable Anis al-Doleh") from Naser al-Din Shah Qajar's Harem, Tehran, Iran. Date unknown. Edited by Ask An Iranian 2021. Read more and find the links on ASKANIRANIAN.COM Check the merchandise out on ASKANIRANIAN.COM/SHOP

Yes, Iran has a functioning democracy, and no, this episode won't help you fully understand its complex structure. We can, however, help you understand that its structure has a presidential role. Yes, every four years Iranians will get out and vote for a candidate to fulfil this role. This year—2021—is one of those years, but rumour has it that not as many Iranians will go and exercise their democratic duties. This doesn't seem to just be a rumour, however! Some of our Iranian audience on Instagram suggested they likely not participate in this Iran presidential election. In this episode, we do our very best to give you an overview of how Iran is both similar and different in its political structure. We also share our experiences of voting in Iran during recent years. Lastly, we give you an audio glimpse of how Tehran looks as it gears up to election day. Oh, and we delicately skirt around how things went down with previous elections. We're looking at you 2009! Questions we also get answers to in this episode Music credit: “Mahvash, Parivash”, Jalal Hemmati Image credit: one of the promotional points for Iranian candidates at the 2021 elections, edited by Ask An Iranian Read more and find the links on ASKANIRANIAN.COM Check the merchandise out on ASKANIRANIAN.COM/SHOP

Birthdays happen to the best of us, and Iranians are no exception. To make things worse, these yearly occurrences won't just happen once a year — no, no... Think about it, there are many Iranian birthday parties. There's your parents' birthdays, your aunts' and uncles' birthdays, your work chums' birthdays, and maybe even your pets' birthdays. In fact, chances are that you're planning for a birthday, or even an Iranian birthday, right now! Celebrations for birthdays are somewhat similar around the world, in that we make a fuss for the ones we love. Yes, every culture makes its own fuss in its own way, so we thought that we'd make a fuss, about how Iranians make a fuss. Listen to learn more about Iranian birthdays If you're learning about Iranian culture, or happen to be surrounded by Iranians, then learning about Iranian birthdays is kinda important. Knowing how to say "happy birthday" in Persian (Farsi) and when to say it is a good start, but we recommend you learn a little more. Also during this episode, we teach you what gifts to get Iranians on their birthdays, and how they will be received during an Iranian birthday party. For all the above, and more, be sure to check out this episode. Questions we also get answers to in this episode Music credit: “Mahvash, Parivash”, Jalal Hemmati Image credit: Colourful cupcake with a question mark for a candle, created by Ask An Iranian, 2021. Read more and find the links on ASKANIRANIAN.COM Check the merchandise out on ASKANIRANIAN.COM/SHOP

In 2005 our guest, Katayoun Khosrowyar, arrived in Iran, fresh-off-the-boat and completely unaware of how her visit would change the direction of her life, as well as the lives of other Iranian women. This isn't because she turned up without a headscarf and had to borrow another woman's, but more because of her role in shaping women's football in Iran. Questions we also get answers to in this episode Find Kat Khosrowyar on Twitter and Instagram Music credit: “Mahvash, Parivash”, Jalal Hemmati Image credit: Iranian women's under 19 national football team - with coach Katayoun Khosrowyar. Image heavily doctored by Ask An Iranian, using a background image of Kiev stadium. Read more and find the links on ASKANIRANIAN.COM Check the merchandise out on ASKANIRANIAN.COM/SHOP

An inquisitive English lady by the name of Lucy got in touch with us, hoping to settle a question that has been on her mind. She lives on an artists' residency with an Iranian, and this gentleman seems to have aroused her curiosity. What Lucy is curious to know is, are all Iranians hairy? To help settle at least one part of Lucy's curiosity, we asked our Iranian Instagram followers to help get her an answer to this, and other Iranian hair-related questions. Obviously, our loyal listeners agreed with our thoughts on the matter, that yes, Iranians are hairy, but something more interesting popped up in the other responses. This was that as much as Iranian men make a point of manscaping their bodies, the opposite is desired by their female counterparts. Between our conversation about the excess hair on Iranians, we also discuss the opposite. Yes, apparently Iranians are also synonymous with a lack of hair, but up top. Getting excited? You should be because from baldness to full-on furriness, we let you know whether Iranians are hairy, and a whole lot more. Questions we also we also get answers to in this episode Iranians, have your say! We regularly ask questions to help us provide answers to questions, but to also help provide content for episodes. If you'd like to provide answers to our questions, simply follow Ask An Iranian on Instagram and check our stories. Music credits: “Mahvash, Parivash”, Jalal Hemmati | www.bensound.com, composer: Benjamin Tissot | "Japanese Instrumental Background Music", SAM YouTube Image credit: Either Garfield of Winston the Persian cat, courtesy of @winstonsmushface, via Instagram. Read more and find the links on ASKANIRANIAN.COM Check the merchandise out on ASKANIRANIAN.COM/SHOP

What better way to derive stories than to surround yourself with unfamiliar people, in an unfamiliar place, and with unfamiliar expectations. One specific way in which you can do this is to simply take a flight. Yes, just one trip on a plane is all you need to gain ample resource for reiteration at soirées, thereafter. It is very unlikely that we'll be seeing you at a soirée, so we thought we'd gather our weird and wonderful Iran-related flight stories, right here. Aside from the entertainment value, we thought it would help enlighten our audience as to how it is to travel with Iranians. To help us with this enlightenment task, we once again invited Shanay, to join us in sharing our experiences. Shanay is half Iranian, half Austrian, and has recently moved to Iran to embark on a restoration project. She is a frequent flier and was kind enough to share her stories before once again embarking on another journey. So, flight stories… what’s Iran got? Listen to this episode to find out. Questions we also get answers to in this episode Which souvenirs Find Shanay on: https://www.instagram.com/shanay.hubmann/ Music credit: “Mahvash, Parivash”, Jalal Hemmati Image credit: the cover image has totally been fabricated by Ask An Iranian Read more and find the links on ASKANIRANIAN.COM Check the merchandise out on ASKANIRANIAN.COM/SHOP

Iranians are not ones for saying no, but occasionally when they do say no, they don't actually say no. Having said that, they will either be polite with you while not saying no or will be impolite with you when indicating no. This is because Iranians, like others around the Middle East, will indicate no, with a "noch". "Noch" is an onomatopoeia describing the sound made by Iranians when responding with a no to a yes/no question. This negative response is mostly accompanied by the raising of eyebrows and/or heads along with a slight pouting of lips while making a single click sound. In this episode, we teach you how not to say no to an Iranian, by teaching you how to use "noch". We also walk you through the accompanying gesture while also playing listener examples of "noches" in all their wet juicy glory. Lastly, we let you know when and where to use a "noch", so you can either look cute or avoid looking rude. Questions we also get answers to in this episode onomatopoeia Music credit: “Mahvash, Parivash”, Jalal Hemmati Image credit: "Noch" written in Persian, design by Ask An Iranian. Read more and find the links on ASKANIRANIAN.COM Check the merchandise out on ASKANIRANIAN.COM/SHOP

This is Amir, minutes after proposing to the girl that's grabbing his face. She said yes, and the day after, Amir went to her parent's house to do it as it should be done in Iran. Don't be Amir — run it by the Iranian parents first. Welcome to part 1 of 34 in a series about Iranian marriage. To start things off, we discuss the Iranian courting custom known as "khaastegaari". If you yearn for an Iranian girl and wish to take her hand in marriage, this episode is for you. Or, if you're just curious as to know what a man must go through when taking an Iranian girl's hand in marriage, it's still for you. To help us explain almost everything you need to know about proposing to an Iranian girl, we were joined by Amir. He is better known as being the best man for a great many couples when they get married, so he's quite familiar with the customs both in and out of Iran. Between sharing the story of his marriage proposal we discuss the traditions and customs of this occasion. So to learn about how, when and where you should propose to an Iranian girl, visit here. Question we also get answers to in this episode Music credit: “Mahvash, Parivash”, Jalal Hemmati Image credit: Image credits: photo by Amir, of him and Tannaz, post proposal - edited by Ask An Iranian. Read more and find the links on ASKANIRANIAN.COM Check the merchandise out on ASKANIRANIAN.COM/SHOP